


The Truth About JJ

by MagicalPony2307



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV), Higher Ground
Genre: Case Fic, F/F, Past Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-10-05 02:44:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17316578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagicalPony2307/pseuds/MagicalPony2307
Summary: When a case and personal revelations bring JJ's past to the surface, she must begin to learn to trust those around her with her true self. A Higher Ground and Criminal Minds crossover that requires little knowledge of either.This was previously posted elsewhere (can't keep track I'm hopeless)





	1. The beginning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is set around season 5, before it all goes to hell for everyone involved. This was also written around the time, hence the absence of some characters.   
> Hope you enjoy, comments always appreciated.

Jennifer Jareau couldn't sleep.

She tossed and turned in the sheets but the sandman was playing hide n' seek and for the life of her she couldn't find him.

Then it clicked. Tomorrow it would be the 23rd of July. Well technically it already was the 23rd. As soon as that thought had entered her mind many others followed, as they did every year since she had found out that her sister had died, or rather, killed herself.

It was the grey hour, as she liked to call it, when the sun wasn't quite up, yet a pale mist of light hugged the sky. She couldn't sleep that night. She had always found it hard to sleep at the time. Going to bed had always reminded her of him, of what he had done to her and her sister.

Then, Peter came in. It was rare for him to enter the girls' room but this was no ordinary occasion. Tonight he would have to inform one of his most troubled students that her sister, the sister she would protect with her life if it was needed, had chosen to die and leave everything and everyone behind.

Fifteen years later and she still felt sick each and every year.

She hadn't actually seen her sister's body but the image her mind's eye had formed was the most atrocious thing she could ever have imagined. It was atrocious that death dared take someone so young, but it was even worse that her sister, her Jess, had chosen to give herself to him.

And just like every year, she was overwhelmed by guilt. Guilt because she had not been there for her sister, guilt because she had left her to suffer the same fate as her, guilt because she had trusted that monster, guilt, unmovable, unrelenting guilt.

She seriously considered calling in sick. Then the thought of being alone in the house didn't really seem appealing. Will had work to do, Henry had to go to school, and she would be alone with her thoughts. Theoretically the thoughts weren't JJ's thoughts, they were Shelby's. But no matter how hard she tried to disassociate her present self from her past she knew that they were one and the same, she would always be Shelby.

For years she had wished that she could start over. She did. It didn't take away her memories, it couldn't bring her the peace she had been longing for and all it had brought was a lifetime of pretending to be someone different. Somebody clean. Somebody innocent. Somebody pure. Somebody she was not.

As she stealthily got out of bed she made up her mind. She would go to work. Hopefully they wouldn't have a case and she would be able to bury herself in paperwork for the rest of the day. She had managed get through the day for the past fifteen years but this year she could have sworn something felt different even though she couldn't quite put her finger on it. Maybe it was simply the fact that she was tired of pretending, she thought. She was going to talk to Will. Let him know who he had really married. Surely he would understand. He loved her and what had happened in the past would not change that, right?

"Chère?" he said. "What's going on?" He could see that something was obviously bothering his wife and truth be told, if she hadn't woken him up when she left their bedroom he wouldn't have bothered to confront her. For some reason JJ had always been a little different in the summer. It was just how she was, but since he was up he thought it would be the right time to talk about whatever had made her this depressed every summer.

"We need to talk" she said not looking up from the cup of coffee she was preparing. "Coffee?" She offered and he nodded in response. He motioned to the living room and sat there waiting for her to come and sit with him. She was seated upright and her finger as if it was acting on its own started to draw circles on her pyjama pants. Will was no profiler but he could undoubtedly tell that she was nervous.

Drawing a deep breath she mentally prepared herself for the words that she was about to speak for the first time in years. He loves you, she reassured herself. He will understand.

So she begun. "Will, there are some things about me you do not know. Hell, you know nothing about my childhood." That was true he thought. He had wondered about that often in the past. He quickly realised that there was probably a reason for that so he had decided not to push the matter. JJ knew that she could trust him, he thought, when she felt ready he trusted that she would talk to him.

But whatever he had suspected, couldn't have been further from the truth.

She took a deep breath.

She bit her lip.

Then she pinched the bridge of her nose.

This couldn't be good was all that Will could think. Well at least she was willing to trust him with what was tormenting her now, instead of hiding like she always did.

"Here goes…" she thought.

"Will, you already know that dad left us- mom, Jess and I, when I was five." He nodded in response, afraid that if he spoke she would stop and she would never give him the truth.

"She remarried this guy- Walt, he seemed like a good guy at first" When his name formed on her lips a shiver run through her, one that didn't go unnoticed by Will, who now placed himself next to JJ, taking her hand in his, a gesture meant to show his silent support.

She removed her hand from under his. She couldn't do this. She had to do this, she reminded herself.

"Walt" she choked his name out, "He, at first he would be really nice. He used to read us stories and bring presents and he even tucked us in bed. Mom couldn't be happier. She had found a man that loved her and her daughters" or so she thought, she added in her head.

Now came the difficult part.

"It all started with a simple kiss, when I was nine." Was this going where he thought it was going? He couldn't believe this. He prayed to God he was wrong but he wasn't.

"By the age of ten he… He... Coming into my room at night became a regular thing. He started abusing me sexually on Jess's birthday that year." She said as fast as she could, as if giving it a required amount of speed would magically make it all disappear.

Will was shocked.

"JJ…" he started. He didn't get a chance to finish his sentence though.

"I ran away at fifteen." She continued. "I lived on the streets for months." She swallowed. Shit, she thought. Come on Jareau. You can finish this.

"I had to sell myself Will, I had to sell myself to survive." Now if the story before this revelation hadn't shocked him, and in fact it had, this knocked the air out of him.

He didn't mean to be judgemental, but he couldn't help but think: Oh my God, I married a fucking whore.

JJ, seemingly not detecting the change in his demeanour from a supportive husband to a really surprised and confused man, went on. "Then dad found me. He sent me to mount Horizon, a school for "troubled teens" basically and you know the rest." She wasn't done with her story though. But all that Will could think that moment was: Oh my God, I married a fucking whore.

"Jess killed herself a couple of years later. Even after that bastard went to prison he haunted her and she couldn't take it. Mom thought she'd run away again, like she had done once before." Like I did, she thought.

Still one thing was running through his mind: Oh my God, I married a fucking whore.

"They found her hanging from a tree in the woods near my mom's house a few days later." She didn't add the fact that it was all her fault. She left Jess there. She had left her all alone to fight her demons. Alone and vulnerable to him.

Oh my God, I married a fucking whore.

Only when she was done did JJ look up and what she saw scared her. Will was looking at her, there was something different about him. Then she realised what it was. Whenever Will saw that JJ was upset, he would try to comfort her by offering her the most basic of things, human touch. Now he had withdrawn from his place next to her a harsh look on his face and she could tell what he was thinking. She had had the same thought a gazillion times before.

She was dirty, undeserving of his love, the comfort that he offered her, his gentle touch. She was a whore, she was dirty, made to be used and thrown away. How could she blame him for thinking what she herself had thought? She was stupid to think that his feelings would remain the same after her true self had been revealed. Stupid and naïve, living in a fantasy world where everything was a fucking walk in the park.

The silence was what was killing her though.

The utter and complete silence.

It was deafening.

It was soon thereafter interrupted by the ringing of her phone. She got up and left, looking at her feet, she couldn't look him in the eye, not like this, not with the tears making their way down her face, not ever again.

She picked her phone up. The voice at the other end of the line, oblivious to her world falling apart, said "Hey JJ, sorry to wake you up at this hour, we have a case, be here in an hour." That was all that Hotch had said. She knew he had to call the others too, this used to be her job.

She ignored Will's stare as she made her way to Henry's room to kiss him goodbye, she wouldn't- couldn't deal with this right now. His staring made her uncomfortable. She didn't want to spend another minute in a life where people not only knew the truth about her, but also were so eager to condemn and judge her for her choices, even if not doing so out loud. And even though she couldn't quite believe it she was actually glad to have a case.


	2. Something to be thankful for, and other things

The past month had been hard on all of them. They were going from case to case and they were hunting down UnSub after UnSub and JJ couldn't be happier about it.

All this work gave her no time to stop and think about what was going on. She knew what was happening but she chose to ignore it. It was just like with Scott, except this time, they were adults, they didn't have Peter and Sophie watching over them and he was not Scott. He wouldn't come around eventually, he wouldn't understand.

It had been hard for Scott to understand at first and he had basically lived through the same abuse Shelby had to some degree. Will didn't understand, he didn't tell her it wasn't her fault and he didn't have adults to stop him from drinking.

"JJ what do you think?"

She'd been caught off guard. They were being presented with yet another case and she was paying little to no attention for the last 10 minutes. Then she looked at the screen.

There they were, two young boys, not much older than Scott had been when she last saw him. They were lying there motionless, their lifeless eyes looking back at her. Then a question slipped out before she could help it "Were they sexually assaulted?"

Garcia looked at Morgan for a second then turned her attention to JJ when he clenched his fists in anticipation. "Yes" was the one-word answer she gave. This was the fifth case they were taking in a month and it seemed that with each one, Garcia lost more of her liveliness.

"So the UnSub first assaults and then kills his victims?" JJ asked once again. There were times she wished that that would happen to her. That a John would kill her and it would all end. That she would be a Jane Doe on some M.E's table with no one looking for her. But she doubted that that was the case here.

He saw her as she walked in. She was with a bunch of suits but the only one that really mattered was her. Could it really be her? Was she really here? Did he get to see her again after all these years?

As they walked into the precinct, Emily couldn't help but notice the Chief practically undressing JJ who was walking next to her with his eyes, what was a surprise was the look of recognition that passed through her friend's eyes followed by one of worry. Her co-worker was really uncomfortable and she was glad when Hotchner finally coughed and begun introducing the team.

The Chief was a tall man, in his early forties, strong built, with a charming yet intimidating smile. What bothered Emily the most was the way he kept looking at JJ. Like he was a child in a candy store and he had made his choice of candy for the day. His brown eyes went from Jennifer's face to her body and back up. Normally, the JJ she knew would whisper something funny in her ear and shrug it off, she was sure that JJ had been used to getting those looks and knew how to deal with the men that gave them, hell she even married one of them. But the way JJ instantly cowered away when the man went for a handshake and instead did the classic Reid wave was what really betrayed that something was not right.

The man, his name was Andrew Walton as he had previously said led them to the room they were to work from and showed them the "most important part of our precinct. You can make your coffee here if you'd like." They all had a long day and they began by spreading everything out. Chief Walton went to get everyone coffee and as he gave JJ hers his fingers "accidentally" brushed against hers instantly bringing back memories.

He's on top of her, her hands tied to the car seat, he has a knife in his hands and all she can think of is how she would either die tonight or get a big tip. The unbearable pain she felt as he kept pounding inside her while he kept carving something she didn't care to read on her shoulder soon overwhelmed her, but she couldn't scream through the gag.

All of a sudden she was back at the precinct, with Emily holding her and trying to clean up the hot coffee she had spilled when he touched her. That was the moment she knew she was not mistaken. He was indeed that bastard. "I'm ok Em, really" she answered to the billion questions Emily had asked at once, before practically rushing her to get some cold water on her hand that she had apparently burned with the coffee.

"I tend to have that effect on the ladies" the chief said with a smirk before Emily drugged a now very upset Jennifer to the bathroom.

"Jennifer?" Emily said with concern as she helped her friend with her hand. "Jen, how do you know this man?"

Of course Emily would notice, JJ thought. She was in a team of some freaking good profilers. One of them was bound to notice at some point. For a moment she considered doing what Horizon had taught her and open up, talk about it. Talk about how that man, was the man that came a close second after Walt on her monster scale. But she couldn't. The only person she had done that as JJ had distanced himself and had been drunk for the last month and kept muttering mean comments. She couldn't do that again. She couldn't put herself in that position again. She couldn't hurt those she loved again.

"I don't"

"Come on JJ you know I'm good at my job" she was going to continue but the look in JJ's eyes told her, pleaded her not to. They were in silence for a while, while Emily was wrapping JJ's hand after taking care of it with some things they had found in a first aid kit, when JJ's phone rung.

JJ used her other hand to take it out of her pocket and let it keep ringing until it finally stopped. This puzzled Emily but she chose not to say anything. The ringing started once again after Emily had finished with JJ's hand, JJ whispered an "I have to get this" to no one in particular and went outside.

"You fucking whore", she could hardly make out what Will was saying. "Where are you? You left again! I told you I want to talk to you!" She tried to keep her cool and answered calmly "I left you a note. We have a case. Are you drunk again?"

"Why do you care if I'm drunk? At least I'm not fucking any bastard that passes by to get high." How did he know that? She hadn't told him about her addiction. Had he read her file? How did he find out who she was? Soon all her questions became meaningless when one dominated her every thought. Where was Henry?

"Will, were are you?"

"Home, the place you left."

"Where is Henry?"

"The little bastard is hiding under his bed. Is that what you did when daddy was drunk chère ?"

Now he was being mean and she was getting worried. Her little boy wasn't safe with him. He shouldn't be exposed to such behavior. She got off the phone as a single tear made its way down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away. She had to get Henry out of there. Before she knew it she was calling the one person she knew she could trust with absolutely anything.

"Daisy, are you there?"

Daisy didn't need much of an expanation.

"Jayje how long has this been going on?" JJ could practically feel the worry emanating from her friend. How could she have let this go on? Deep down she knew that Will would never hurt their son, but he was drunk. She felt guilty for making her friend deal with him, but she knew Daisy would do anything to help. And with two kids of her own, she was sure she could trust her with Henry.

"A month." At that Daisy put two and two together. She had talked with Shelby, or JJ as she liked to be called now, about telling Will about a month ago. Obviously she had, and he hadn't taken it so well. She was furious but most of all worried.

"Don't worry, I'll go pick the little guy up and then I'll give that bastard a piece of my mind." It was no secret that Daisy hadn't liked Will from the beginning. He was practically an older version of Scott, athletic, a playboy. He was bound to hurt her friend, but she also knew that at the time, he was exactly what JJ needed, a long distance relationship, for a person with commitment issues, not that she could blame her, was perfect.

"Dais, no. He's drunk and I don't know what he's capable of. Promise me you're just going to get Henry and go."

"Ok hun, don't worry. But you and I are going to talk about this when you get back ok?"

"Ok. Gotta go. Talk when we get back." And with that she entered their "case room" as they had come to call it, to a sneezing Morgan.

After an echo of "bless you" made its way across the room, JJ sat down next to Morgan and stared at the files in front of her. She was trying to focus on the case files, but all she could see and hear was Morgan's deep breaths and the clenching and unclenching of his hands. It was difficult to not make the connection, but personal experience told her not to mention it, since she was pretty sure that Morgan could very well mistake their concern for pity. What had happened to him was overwhelmingly similar, which gave her an odd idea.

"Guys up to now we assumed that the victims' connection was the similarity in their physical appearance, they were victims of opportunity, right?" When she had the attention of everyone in the room she said, "Why don't we look at their after school activities, we know they didn't go to the same school, but what if their activities intersect somewhere else?" As soon as she said that, she felt Morgan's eyes on her and didn't miss the appreciative nod. He knew she'd made the connection, but hadn't mentioned it and Morgan was grateful.

It was getting late, and since they had no indication that the UnSub would kill again soon, Hotch told them that they were heading to their hotel soon, but since they had no leads other than JJ's hunch which could not be verified or discarded due to the lateness of the hour, they could decide what to do as long as they didn't stay out too late.

At that Morgan shot out of his seat and walked out the precinct to unwind. His secret was out, and although JJ knew that it wasn't right for her to think like that, she was jealous, because he could show he wasn't ok, but everyone knew the boundaries when it came to him.

She was about to head out herself when Emily caught her eye, approaching her with a worried look on her face. "Is he ok?" she asked, referring to Morgan.

"I hope so." She muttered. "You know he doesn't like to talk about it though." She warned Emily. She knew that the older woman had her ways of making people talk, when they needed to and that is why she opted to distance herself from her.

"Well it doesn't help that he's bunking up with Reid." Emily replied, teasingly. "Well I think Reid's googlemouth could actually help distract him." "Agreed" was all Emily said as they made their way toward the SUV. Unknowingly, JJ had given Emily a course of action. Distraction was what the blonde needed, that much was made clear.

At the Hotel lobby, Reid, who had reached the hotel first, approached them. "Hey, do you mind sharing a room, uhm, because earlier, remember Morgan sneezed, and, well there are other symptoms as well, elevated temperature, glazy eyes, and then again, he probably wants to be alone and my rumbling won't really help." He said while fidgeting, and before JJ could respond, Emily had already given the ok.

It wasn't that she minded sharing a room with Emily, as a matter of fact, in the past she had looked forward to it and their impromptu slumber parties. Now Rossi and Hotch weren't going to share a room, as the seniors of the team, and the only other option that would leave her alone would be if Emily were to share a room with Reid. Which after the last time, when she was woken in the middle of the night with a knock on the door and a very grumpy Emily, because, as she had put it, "the Reindroid hibernate mode, doesn't include a mute version", wasn't likely.

Emily thankfully seemed to understand that she didn't want to talk about what was bothering her and was now making small talk. If anyone could understand the need to "hide" from their past, that would be Emily.

"Em, do you mind if I take a shower first?" Lord knows she needed it. She hadn't felt this way since…

"No, go ahead" was the brunette's response. She was worried about Morgan, and ever since their encounter with chief McCreepy in the precinct she was getting worried about JJ. She knew he shouldn't push, but she didn't like the looks that guy was giving JJ, and she sure as hell didn't want her friend to feel uncomfortable because of him. She was sure that the look of recognition JJ had given the guy was indeed real, but she would simply let her friend know that she was there for her, when she needed to talk; at least for the time being.

Distracted by her thoughts as she was, she was shocked to find out that JJ had been in the shower for 45 minutes. That was not normal. As a profiler, she noticed things, and the most time JJ had ever taken in the shower was 20 minutes. This 225% of that, "Woah, Spence, slow down", she thought.

She knocked on the door. "JJ is everything ok?"

She heard a muffled, "yeah, just a second" and went back to her bed. When JJ made her way out, she was fully dressed. That did strike her as odd, as the two women had shared rooms plenty of times and although not entirely naked, they were not ashamed of being in each other's presence with barely a towel on. In fact, Emily had grown to long for those moments, those glimpses of skin and wet blonde hair. She knew it was wrong, she knew JJ was only her friend, but she couldn't help it. She saw this however as another sign. JJ didn't want to feel exposed, she was lifting walls around herself, and as she was about to ask again, if the younger woman was ok, Jennifer took out a book, a sign, Emily came to notice meant "do not disturb".

She let out a breath and went to take a shower herself, making a promise to herself, that when the younger woman was ready to talk, she would be there.


	3. Chapter 3

Sun rays were starting to make themselves visible, and they found JJ sitting on her bed, gazing out the window. 6:05, just a few more minutes before her alarm would go off, signifying the beginning of another day, hopefully another day as JJ, and not as the damaged little girl she became at night, too afraid to even let herself sleep, for the monsters were still lurking in her sleep.

Emily lay there, watching. She was baffled as to what she could do to help her friend. Just when she thought she had figured JJ out, just when she believed that maybe there was one truly innocent in their team, she realized that JJ had demons too, and if anything, she was really scared to find out what they were. She checked the time, the bright light of her phone screen hurting her eyes. They would have enough time to talk, before they were needed at the precinct, maybe long enough to understand what the deal with the chief was.

" 'Morning", she said, making her presence known as she scrambled out of bed, ready to start with her morning routine as she normally would. JJ made a non-committal sound in return. She didn't want to use the knowledge she acquired on the job, while undercover, but she knew that the only way to help her friend was to understand what was going on. Routine was good, it made people feel safe. If she'd gotten criminals to open up to her that way she was going to get JJ to do that too.

When Emily came out of the bathroom she fond JJ still sitting there, as she'd left her, deep in thought. JJ was trapped in her own mind, how she found it ironic that after all these years she would still be afraid of the same monsters. How she still thought that fear was all she was. After all these years.

Emily thought it futile to ask whether the blonde was ok. Stupid question, she thought to herself. "How can I help?" escaped her mouth before she could stop it. But instead of retracting the question in the face of her friend's puzzled look she owned up to it.

"JJ we both know that you haven't been acting like yourself lately" and when JJ went to interrupt her she just kept going. "Clearly, you are going through something, something big. And I want to help you, because you are my friend and quite frankly I'm worried about you. So how can I help?"

JJ was tearing up. How stupid had she been to believe that a whole team of profilers would not notice the change? She was also taken aback from the emotion in her friend's words. She wanted to tell Emily. Emily could protect her, she was fiercely protective of those around her. If only her mother had been a bit like Emily…

"I… ah" and suddenly her throat was dry, and she couldn't speak the words. "Em, I can't. Not right now. I will tell you, when we get back." At least that was something, Emily thought. But still the chief and his behavior, and the effect it was having on JJ.

She needed to do something, and she needed to act now. "JJ? What's the deal with the chief?" The scared face on the younger woman's face told her everything she needed to know for now. "I mean you don't have to tell me anything if you don't want to. But please answer me this. Do you want me to keep him away?"

The lack of a response had worried Emily even more. Then a nod came, and then a single tear. And eventually a hoarse "thank you" and a hug. Yes, Emily had gotten through to her.

Emily's efforts bared fruit that same afternoon, as chief McCreepy was getting insistent on working with JJ in her quest to find out the connection between the victims. His eagerness hadn't gone unnoticed by anyone who could see, and Emily sure as hell would not stand by and allow him to make her friend uncomfortable.

"With all due respect chief, but I don't think that's a good idea." she begun. The chief turned around to face her, breaking his grip-like stare on JJ. "How so?" he muttered seeming genuinely interested in anything anyone other than her blonde co-worker muttered. "Well you are a local police man, and I imagine a well-known one around here. In an afternoon programme for troubled teens like this, I can hardly see how the police will be welcome. I think that if we go we will seem more unthreatening to them in plain clothes." Seeing as he couldn't argue with that he nodded to signify his consent to the plan. "Fine", he said. "Make sure you update me when you get back.

The relief was visible in Jennifer's face as she mouthed a thank you to Emily and let out the breath she was holding. She was sure that it would only bring more questions but the longer she thought about it, the safer Emily seemed to her. The logical part of her brain started to work and she could see how Emily would see that JJ simply had no other choice, no choice in running away from Walt, and no choice in running away from her name and story later. The need for a clean slate was one she could see being mirrored in the brunette, but her experience with Will told her otherwise. "But Will never really understood anything" the voice in her head told her, a voice she had silenced for far too long.

"Sh-JJ?" A curly haired man approached them, clearly surprised to see them there. "You mean they actually thought it was a good idea to give you a gun? Forget I ever said that, I like my face too much to have it shot at." Emily was intrigued to say the least. JJ on the other hand seemed happy to see him. She hadn't talked to Ezra in years, not since he broke up with Daisy. Not that it was some dramatic break up, they both realised that they had outgrown each other and decided to let each other go, they both respected what they had managed to build to let it go before they tarnished it with unpleasantness. But in all that, JJ hadn't been in contact as much.

His had a beard now, JJ noticed, and he seemed tired. Well she was sure that keeping a theatre club for troubled teens was not an easy job, but he seemed content. After they got over the initial introductions the three of them got to the reason of the agents' visit. "Yeah they were both here. Becket more on a regular basis, but Anderson, he only came around two or three times." Emily could see that her colleague was on amicable terms with the man, but the statistics were against them. There was no chance that this connection was coincidental and that would only mean that someone in that theatre club was their UnSub, and more often than not in these situations it turned out to be the counsellor, or the director in this case.

"They were both sexually assaulted prior to their deaths" Emily continued, and Ezra looked at JJ with a sympathetic look when she tensed up. Emily noticed but she gave no indication that she did. Only when JJ took lead in the line of questioning did Emily let her guard down and let the worried look travel to her face, one that was hidden from JJ, but clearly visible to Ezra.

"We'll let you know if we need your help again" Emily wrapped up, only to be surprised yet again when she saw the man hug JJ and tell her "Tell Daisy I said hi?". Well of course they were all allowed their personal lives but JJ always made it seem like she had let the team be a part of everything, and to find out they were not, or that she was not as great of a part in JJ's personal life as she had thought, it affected her more than she would have thought.

Later that afternoon, JJ would get a text from Ezra saying "Don't think you can fool me. ;p She seems nice, dump him and go for it." She would shrug the thought off, as she knew that Ezra was not the best reader of situations, but the boy, or man now, had quite a vivid imagination if he ever thought that JJ had a chance with someone as genuinely good as Emily, she thought to herself.

With the connection established the team moved to deliver the profile. "A man in his mid-thirties, as the maturity and clarity in his MO suggests. He knows where to find vulnerable young men, he most likely takes them somewhere and they follow him, as they trust him, which makes a local. He is meticulous, well-practiced and he is most likely perpetuating a circle of abuse, emotional or physical, that started with him being the victim." As much as JJ hated to admit it, this seemed to fit Ezra to a tee when she heard Hotch announce it, however she knew not to doubt her friend, as he hadn't doubted her even when she didn't deserve it.

Emily kept thinking that something was wrong, something didn't quite fit. Everything about the UnSub being a local she agreed with, however something about the rushed nature of the rape, and consequent murder seemed too 'excited' to be perpetrated by someone as calculated as their profile would suggest. However, the news Garcia brought to them were what worried her the most, for JJ's sake. Apparently "Ezra Friedkin, the counsellor slash director my crime fighting ladies spoke to earlier today, is a tougher cookie than he looks, and let me tell you he looks fine, what a shame. So the poor man was apparently caught for drug use when he was a teenager due to some problems with his family and sent to a programme for troubled teens, not unlike the one he's running now. Well except the other one was like a full-time thing instead of an afternoon activity." she said before she hung up. Morgan was the first to speak. "It looks like we got our guy".


	4. Chapter 4

"Hotch, I think there may be something we missed" interjected Emily. The next words she spoke, left her mouth without even checking with her friend, the same friend she'd told she would not push more than she was welcome to. "I mean for one, JJ knows him and would have said something if she thought he was capable, and overall, he was really helpful."

Jennifer seemed uncomfortable with all the questioning looks, however well intentioned they may have been. Unbeknownst to the rest, Reid's perplexed look was not directed at JJ, but at the police chief, who had started "perspiring" and if he was a gambling man, Reid would bet that his heart rate had increased. Of course, it was possible that the guy was anxious over getting the guy that was committing those crimes on his turf, but still, it rubbed Spencer the wrong way.

Jennifer cleared her throat and proceeded, "I knew him when he was younger, and before you start, that's as far as I'm going to go. He has been through a lot, but I am certain he is not capable of this." She took one more moment to think about this. "Besides there was no sexual abuse in his past, the UnSub here is definitely sexually motivated, so perpetuating a circle of violence he didn't experience would not make sense anyway."

Hotchner walked back and forth, and Emily cracked her fingers. "I have a feeling we are going at this the wrong way, we should look at the profile again, Sir."

As much as the unit chief, like any other, didn't like being told he was wrong, he had to admit, this felt wrong. This was, at the same time, to well planned to be as haphazard as it was. There was no hard evidence left behind, but the kills were excitable. The UnSub was at the same time a meticulous planner, but somehow, he was also inexperienced. The two were irreconcilable in the team's brains, yet they couldn't put the puzzle together.

"Right, I think we should bring him in regardless." At that there were some signs of relief on the Chief's face, only noticed by JJ and Reid. As the Chief left the room, Hotchner added "not as a suspect, but I think he may be of more help than we initially thought."

That's when JJ's phone started buzzing. She looked down. It was Will. Apparently, he thought the best way to deal with this was through sending a couple of messages as apology.

After being given their orders, JJ went outside to deal with this.

The more time passed, the more JJ was starting to feel like herself. Of course, she had never been proud of what had happened, and what she had to do. But at the same time, she was starting to realise that this was not her fault, the situation with Will. She was angry now, more than anything else. Angry that she had married a petulant child, that didn't understand. But the shame remained there, and as long as that was the case, she remained too confused to see that he would never understand, that this type of person did not deserve her, and not the other way around.

What did start to make itself clear was that JJ didn't feel that she could forgive him for going on a binge of drinks and insults and that endangering Henry, that, she was not particularly fond of. She needed a friend. She thankfully had one that knew her entire story, and one she was fairly certain she wouldn't lose when she told them. So, she picked up her phone, dismissed Will's messages and called Daisy.

Back at the station Reid was wearing his, "do not disturb, currently computing" face. Rossi had gone to announce to the rest of the precinct that they wanted all the notes on any interviews they had carried before they got here, and Hotchner with Derek had gone to bring Mr. Friedkin in. That left Emily, who was trying to piece together two separate things. Why the UnSub had such an inconsistent M.O. and why the fuck her friend, well a friend whom she considered much more than just that, would not open up to her.

Reid was mumbling, "why on earth would he be relieved?" and then on repeat "relief".

"Who is relieved?" Emily asked him, her right eyebrow slightly raised.

"The Chief" he said as he moved his hand away from his chin, which he had been previously rubbing, deep in thought. "When Hotch said that we should bring the guy in, he was relieved."

Now these were too many "coincidences" for Emily Prentiss. In addition to the reactions this guy had elicited from her friend, well things weren't looking too good for the Chief. But she had promised herself not to bring JJ's personal nightmare up in front of the team, unless she had made sure with the woman. It was not her story to tell. Besides she currently didn't know what to tell them.

Reid somewhat unexpectedly asked "Is JJ okay?" and then added at the look she gave him. "Come on Prentiss, we are all profilers, and she doesn't like the Chief at all. Is there something there?" They both knew that bringing up such accusations against the Chief, that he knew the guy committing this series of crimes, based on so little evidence was risky. They both knew the risk of uncooperative police forces in the future if they made the mistake of accusing the man of this and being wrong. But they also both knew that the feeling they got, must be justified. Prentiss settled for a nod at the question. She then added "We need to be absolutely sure. I'll talk to JJ."


End file.
